Archive for the 'Humour' Category

Jul 24 2010

Networking and redundancy (double meanings)

Published by Dougal under Humour, Networking, Work

For the past three and a half years I have been working on router redundancy protocols. When your router (or its upstream connection) dies for some reason you want to minimise the loss on people using the network. Ideally users should never notice loss of connection, though in the real world there will be some time delay before things are working again. The work I’ve been doing relies on having a second router which has its own connection to the local network and to the wider world. It acts as a redundant backup so that when the first one dies the second can step into its place within some short period.

When the primary router is working normally the secondary doesn’t do much. Its only role is to monitor the liveliness of the primary machine. The redundant router can often be used for other things when the primary is operating — and many times the primary acts as a redundant router for the secondary’s clients. Each provides backup for the other.

So when I found out recently that I was being made redundant I thought “great! I’ll just sit and watch other people working and take over if they burst into flames”. But it turns out that when people are redundant it’s totally different from when routers are redundant. Instead of being relied on for backup in case of failure, it means “no longer working”. Strange but true! I can see why it wouldn’t catch on very well in networking.

My last day at Cisco is this Friday (30 July). It’s been an interesting few years and provided novel experiences, silly conversations about Star Trek and given me a bit more confidence. I’m sad to be going, and though there will always be loose ends to tie up and the promise of interesting projects on the horizon, the team I’m leaving behind seems to have a glut of these at the moment. I’m also disappointed that the study group at work will continue reading SICP without me. Obviously I can read it alone but the discussion and peer support/pressure was a useful part of it.

Meanwhile, the job hunt continues. Recruitment agencies make this process at least ten times harder by hiding the employer, the industry and the specifics of the job for their own ends. I have had a few friends pass on job details, and had some telephone discussions, but no success yet. Watch this space, or one very much like it.

One response so far

May 11 2010

The fake yo-yo-er also doesn’t juggle at children’s parties

Published by Dougal under Humour, Society

Would it be “ludicrous to think of hiring a juggler without first seeing him perform”? Raganwald has made this point in the past, with reference to professional interviews. But if someone comes to you claiming to be a yo-yo champion it would be rude to challenge them on this point.

One response so far

Jan 18 2010

Hm, I think not.

Published by Dougal under Humour, Programming

Taken from the man page for strncmp:

       The following sections are informative.
 
EXAMPLES
       None.
 
APPLICATION USAGE
       None.
 
RATIONALE
       None.
 
FUTURE DIRECTIONS
       None.

I hope that was a joke.

One response so far

Oct 19 2009

Offences against humour

Published by Dougal under Friends, Humour

A conversation over IM earlier today. I’m the guilty D in this exchange.

M: Then all you need is a sofa on wheels, and you can really travel in style.

D: I know where I can get one of them! Ssofa so good you might say, but how do I couch my idea in more marketable terms? I don’t want to lounge around all day, I want to chaise the big money!

M: Those were terrible.

D: You can’t deny the joy of punning — have a go, you ottoman.

M: You are a bad man.

D: It was all going so well, and then I just went and put my futon it.

M: I’m going to report you to the ‘Law and Order: Misuse of Puns’ division

D: Will they lock me up and take me away in divan?

Five minutes pass.

D: Oh no, I’ve killed him.

2 responses so far

Jul 06 2009

Best. Religion. Analogy. Ever.

Published by Dougal under Humour, Religion

From Charlie Brooker’s latest column:

God/no God? No God. We’re all freelancers. Some of us may choose to sit in imaginary offices from time to time, pretending to receive memos from our made-up boss, or enjoying watercooler conversations about the loving/vengeful/forgiving nature of our fictional chief with our colleagues, but no matter how many hours we clock up, it doesn’t alter the fact that no one’s actually running things on the top floor. This is good news. We own the company!

2 responses so far

Jun 22 2009

Overheard in Edinburgh

Published by Dougal under Humour, Life

Two of us were standing at the bus stop outside the Central Library. A small group of people walked past in animated conversation. We only caught the briefest part before they were out of earshot again:

…so you can have an entirely private conversation without being overheard…

We laughed.

One response so far

Mar 02 2009

Daily Mail really is its own parody

Published by Dougal under Bad Science, Humour

The Daily Quail gets better and better as the Mail continues to plough its way through ever sillier depths. The Quail here does a brilliant round-up of all the red wine cures/causes cancer that the Mail runs on a regular basis.

It’s saddening to think that only one of these “newspapers” is a satire and parody.

No responses yet

Feb 15 2009

This man could win a sword-fight with wit like that

Published by Dougal under Books, Humour, Science

We took out membership of the local library this afternoon, and spent half an hour browsing. I got out The Extended Phenotype, a sequel of sorts to The Selfish Gene. In the preface he states that the first chapter goes over a lot of ground from the previous book, and tries to clear up misapprehensions and answer complaints from critics of The Selfish Gene. But I’ve never seen such a back-handed compliment as this:

I am grateful to my critics for forcing me to think again about how to express difficult matters more clearly.

See the kerfuffle behind Mary Midgley’s review for an example of the critics who just didn’t get it, no matter how simply it was worded.

No responses yet

Feb 06 2009

Johnsburg, Illinois (or, An exercise in fooling ourselves)

Published by Dougal under Humour

It’s fairly well known that human beings are apt to fool themselves that coincidences have deeper meaning. I recently found a great little game to demonstrate this.

This is actually just a silly questions meme, but it has a nice mixture of producing answers that are (a) unrelated to any actual answers you would give and (b) demonstrating what kind of music you listen to. And like I said, it’s great for showing how easily we spot patterns in meaningless coincidence.

The rules are:

  1. Put your iPod or other music player on shuffle.
  2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
  3. You must write that song name down no matter how silly it sounds!

This is what I got. How many of these do you think are relevant answers to the questions? I would say nearly a dozen.

If someone says “is this okay” you say?
9th & Hennepin
What would best describe your personality
Terrific Speech 2
What do you like in a guy/girl?
Houston
What is your life’s purpose?
Weather Storm
What is your motto?
Mainstream
What do your friends think of you?
Sing for the Submarine
What do you think about often?
World Keeps Turning
What is 2+2?
Everything You Can Think
What do you think of your best friend?
Echoplex
What is your life story?
Breaking Into Heaven
What do you want to be when you grow up?
A Sight for Sore Eyes
What do you think when you see the person you like?
Juliet (Keep That In Mind)
What do your parents think of you?
Prescilla
What will you dance to at your wedding?
All is Well
What will they play at your funeral?
Heads Will Roll
What is your hobby/interest?
Watch Her Disappear
What is your biggest secret?
Hunter
What do you think of your friends?
Don’t Know Why
What’s the worst thing that could happen?
Atoms for Peace
How will you die?
All Summer Long
What is the one thing you regret?
Foreign Affair
What makes you laugh?
Hike
What makes you cry?
Last Tide
Will you ever get married?
Leila Came Round and We Watched a Video
What scares you the most?
Bigger Than Me
Who likes you?
Generation Y?
If you could go back in time, what would you change?
You Don’t Know Jesus
What hurts right now?
Scotland’s Shame
What will you post this as?
Johnsburg, Illinois

I particularly enjoyed “what is the one thing you regret? — foreign affair” and “what hurts right now? — Scotland’s shame”.

2 responses so far

Jan 16 2009

Oversimplify the problem and choose a misleading name

The blind man at the back takes firm hold of the tail and says:

But why do we need to call it an elephant? No-one knows what that is. Everyone knows what a rope is, so we should just call it a rope.

And that is how the elephant came to be labelled a rope in all the guide books.

No responses yet

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