Looking Out To Sea

A conversation over IM earlier today. I’m the guilty D in this exchange.

M: Then all you need is a sofa on wheels, and you can really travel in style.

D: I know where I can get one of them! Ssofa so good you might say, but how do I couch my idea in more marketable terms? I don’t want to lounge around all day, I want to chaise the big money!

M: Those were terrible.

D: You can’t deny the joy of punning — have a go, you ottoman.

M: You are a bad man.

D: It was all going so well, and then I just went and put my futon it.

M: I’m going to report you to the ‘Law and Order: Misuse of Puns’ division

D: Will they lock me up and take me away in divan?

Five minutes pass.

D: Oh no, I’ve killed him.